Memorial Day Weekend, 2004

A firsthand report of the Bulgarian invasion of Montana, USA.

Click on any image for a larger view.

June showed us around the valley ranching area on Saturday, and the Zahariev kids get their first up close look (and smell) of a horse.

Vlado, Milena and their three kids, Albena, Sylvia and Daniel, (respectively), visited Whitehall over the Memorial Day weekend. The weather leading up to their arrival was rainy enough for them to decide to delay leaving Portland, Oregon another day, in the hopes of letting the bad weather move out of the area.

"Wise choice, Grashoppers." From Saturday through Monday we had mostly sun, with just ocasional slight drizzles, and were able to get out to do some hiking on the trails of the Lewis and Clark Caverns Park.

The first day was spent with June Severance, long time area resident originally from Chicago, and we saw some of the local ranch and farming country. None of this area is pictured on this page because people from Bulgaria hate ranchers and farmers. Either that or we didn't have the camera.

After driving around horsie country we rolled the windows backed down, and headed for a visit to the closest town people living in civilization may have heard of: Butte.

On the way there Sylvia demonstrated not only her amazing ability to climb around the inside of a moving minivan, but also her incredible talent for annoying both driver and fellow passengers alike.

We took the scenic route out of Whitehall to Butte, and there are some really great views of the steep cliffs along the roadway. Remember, you can click on any image for the Jumbotron ® view.

Sunday was probably the most active day of the weekend, with a full day's hiking on the paths in the park. Once you get out of Whitehall a stretch, and begin nearing the park, the road cuts through some steep mountains with some really nice views like the one to the left.

The park is only fourteen miles out of Whitehall, and a good bit of it is spent cutting through places like this. On many of these kinds of passes the speed limit signs still say 70 MPH, which Vlado interpreted as a minimum rather than a maximum. You'd be amazed at how well Toyota minivans corner!

Setting out on the trail.

Now you may have noticed above that the name of the park includes with the word caverns. But it wasn't really practical on this weekend, since we had an eighteen month old baby along.

Montana park rangers, however, are not only helpful, but also very accommodating, and even volunteered to secure little Daniel down with duct tape there in the visitors' center while we explored the caverns. Vlado and I didn't think Milena would go for this, what with all that maternal instinct clouding her thinking, so we had to be content to include the caverns only in a future visit.

Intrepid explorers Sylvia, Albena, Daniel and Milena are followed by myself as we make ourselves up the trail. The total distance is right at about two miles, and pretty much all uphill for the first half.

For most of that way up you walk down lush paths, with switchbacks every now and then that lead to the highest elevation along the path. I was thinking this might be prime bear country, and so was really glad to have along with us small children who would not be able to run near as fast as me.

Once you get near the higher elevations you begin to see views like this one to the right just about everywhere, but no photograph can do them justice. These were by far the most spectacular views I've seen since coming to Montana a few weeks before. Having grown up in Florida, a state contesting with Kansas for the "flatter than a pancake" national title, I still find myself staring at them like Matt Stone staring at the little birdie near the beginning of Baseketball. (Granted, that reference will be lost on many, but for me it has special, if idiosyncractic, meaning.)

Often, these views practically explode in front of you, as you you come out a thick bit of trail into open space. And then They'll disappear as you go back into the underbrush.

The U.S. contigent of the Zahariev clan. Left to right: Sylvia, Vlado, Milena (restraining the explosive Daniel), and Albena.

This picture to the left will be on the front of their upcoming debut CD, The Zaharievs sing the Partridge Family. Milena is a shoe-in for the part originally played by Shirley Jones, but they're still haggling over whether Vlado plays David Cassidy or Danny Bonaduce.

Vlado and I have known each other since about 95 or 96, when we slaved in the BellSouth mines of Atlanta over hot Hewlett-Packard Unix workstations.

If I get this right, his trajectory has taken them from Atlanta to Florida, then to Portland, Oregon. I left Atlanta for New York City, and then basically to San Franscisco and Oakland, before arriving in Montana on May 14, 2004.

Yep, when you spy for both the KGB and the CIA (and visa versa), you do get around!

Here I am being accosted by both Sylvia and Albena while Vlado keeps Daniel at bay. Bulgarian children are taught the art of hand to hand combat at a very early age. I guess that's how they held off the Turks.

Albena displays her mastery of the 45 degree angle.

Sylvia and Albena are probably the two most creative little kids I've ever met. Their innate ability to entertain themselves with improvised stories involving the most unimaginable characters and scenarios can be extremely entertaining... for about the first couple hours.

Beyond that, one begins to wonder how much restriction would need to be placed upon their air intake to quiet them without causing permanent damage. In the confines of a speeding minivan one begins to think in terms of "too much" permanent damage.

Not far into the hike Sylvia picked up a stick bent into the shape of a lazy letter 'C'. From this simple little natural throwaway sprang forth a story of a boat and its passengers. The boat then turned magical and rescued a college student who had been spat into the water and attacked by sharks. After that I began to lose track of the details, but I seem to remember a marriage, and other sticks that became magic rockets the boat was launching, among other fantasticals.

After a while I asked her how much longer the story would go on. "Until the end of the walk," she replied with great enthusiam.

The excitement was clearly evident on my face.

We stopped at the place on the left and enjoyed the view on the right. Just in front of where we sat was a very steep drop and a long way down, hence my grip on Daniel.

The hike ended at the same picnic area from where we started, so here are a few shots of our rest before leaving the park.

Vlado and Milena, wondering why they ever thought children would be a good thing, I imagine. And Milena being Mom.

Here Sylvia and Albena retrieve a key on a string that I placed up in the tree to test their cooperative skills.

After Lewis and Clark Caverns, we headed out to a few surrounding areas and found this old place. Click the picture on the right to read its history.

Interesting bit of anatomical information about Bulgarian babies: as you'll notice in the picture to the right, Bulgarian babies are born with fully adult sized feet. They spend the next sixteen or so years growing into them. This explains why Bulgarian school children excel in such activities as soccer (what they erroneously call 'football'), clogging, and marching band.

"My little brother is evil. He casts spells on all of us and practices mind control. I'm the only one who knows. Call the police. Call the police."

Click on this shot to the left to see the pious concentration on Albena's and Sylvia's faces as they recite the children's pre-hike prayer.

"Dear God. Father of Heavan and Earth. Please allow the adults to get bit by rattlesnakes and eaten by bears, so that we may end this silly walking around in the woods all day, boost the van and roadtrip it down to Daytona Beach so that we may par -- tay... oh, yeah, Amen."

And finally, two last shots to finish up our little Memorial Day extravaganza.


A parting shot of one more spectacular view.	Jefferson Valley Presents new home in Whitehall, where I'm the new secretary and will be performing theater soon.

Hope you enjoyed the pics. C'ya!

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